Hand of Purity [May 18, 2015]

[Sisip]

The news today hosts the following story. A pretty blonde woman with quite a bit of makeup sat behind the news desk.

"The organization named the Hand of Purity is in uproar today after the discovery of hundreds of thousands of donation dollars disappearing along with Founder and Spiritual Leader Pastor Burt Bacharach. Authorities are scouring the area but believe Pastor Burt has crossed State lines and they are calling for the aid of other States in finding the man who could possibly be the biggest shill artist Salem has ever seen.

The doors to the Hand of Purity are closing in light of this theft and citizens of Salem have stepped forward to assist the hundreds of homeless and needy citizens that relied on their care. Hospital wards are taking those infected with the most recent flu and those who show no signs are being transported to nearby homeless shelters.

The Head of Police in Salem has made a statement suggesting the hardships that came with the recent flu outbreak, the attention of the CDC and local officials may have pushed Pastor Bacharach into fleeing responsibility of not alerting the CDC of the illness early enough to fight it successfully. Though hundreds are ill there have been no fatalities reported yet.

This has been Ivanna Dolittle, with News2Salem."